NPR Talk of the Nation did a great piece recently about caring for alzheimer’s patients. Specifically, what to do when they ask you about a dead family member who they don’t remember has passed. Do you tell them that they’ve passed or do you lie to them? Is it ethical to lie to the elderly?

[NPR: Talk of the Nation Segment]

An excellent suggestion that the host made was that perhaps if you know you’re going to be prone to having alzheimer’s due to family history, maybe you could consider putting an instruction in your living will (or a Health Care Directive as we call it here in Massachusetts) that allows your health care proxy, nurse or caregiver to lie to you when you get to that sustained memory loss stage where it would do more harm than good to be truthful. In doing so, you not only taking the ethical debate out (since you said it was OK to do so in advance), but you also take the pressure off the caregiver by telling them, “Hey, it’s OK to lie to me. It’s better this way.”